I withdraw and keep to myself and this seems to always puzzle or even bother people. They often mistake this for sadness, and surely there is some loneliness to it, but I feel much more alone with most people then I do with my self.
Most people are empty... they strive for these cultural standards because they think they can fill that emptiness with the approval of others.
How can it not depress you to be around these kinds of people? Try going to a party and honestly observing the people around you and what's going on. Most everyone you know will start acting like a completely different person. Girls will act more stupid, guys will get more competitive and it all adds up to be a bunch of horse shit.
So am I depressed? no. It may simply seem that way because I withdraw my self when I smell bullshit. And I hate being around that emptiness... Those people that try to make you love them... not because they love you, but because they don't love themselves. They drain you life away.
Its like this world is some kind of leech fest. Everyone just trying to suck a little life out of the person next to them. They never see you as an individual, just a means to an end.
Go to your churches, your parties, all your little social interactions... its all just a mass emptiness. We celebrate that emptiness, we love it, we immerse ourselves in it, we worship it.
Almost no one has anything to offer, and even less want what I have to give.
1 comments:
I completely agree. I don't like how everyone around me tries to be something they're not.
however, i do think that everyone has a surface to them. I enjoy and love making intimate relationships, and talking about ideas. But also, i appreciate having fun in just the moment.
I take these shallow relationships as they are, and nothing more. And I appreciate them for that.
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